Life Category

Black Cracks

There’s a belief in our culture that “black don’t crack.” Since I hit forty several years ago, someone often tells me  how good I look for my age. “What they say is true, because you prove that black don’t crack.” Yes, for the most part black women tend to look younger than we actually are. […]

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There’s No Place to Get

I’ve decided to put to bed the part of me that needs to have things be a certain way. I’m moving slower, breathing deeper, worrying less and being with what is, without the need to make it different. I feel a certain knowing that I’m fine just as I am. I don’t need to make […]

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In Celebration of Homosexuality

Some of my most cherished friendships are with gay and lesbian people. For some reason I have always felt connected to the plight of the person who couldn’t fully be him- or herself for fear of being shamed, too different, or, where I grew up, an abomination to God. Today I have several gay friends, […]

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The Healing Begins

After being diagnosed with a precancerous lump on my breast, I’ve decided to make some changes to bring optimal health to my body. I’ve never had any real health scares with the exception of having an abnormal pap smear when I was about sixteen. The test showed that I had precancerous cells in my uterus, […]

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I Feel Beautiful

About year ago, I started thinking about no longer dyeing my hair. Having been gray since I was twenty-three years old, twenty years of dyeing was beginning to just wear me down. The thought stayed with me in a very light way. Being the naturalist that I am I started researching herbs and minerals that […]

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Some Day My Prince Will Come

Some day my prince will come. Someday I’ll find my love and how thrilling that moment will be when the prince of my dreams comes to me. All my life these lyrics have served as my prayer. I recall the hours planning my wedding, with a white dress, hundreds of flowers, a line of bridesmaids […]

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Love From the Shadows

Romantic relationships have been the forum of my deepest pain and darkest shadows. Before my son was born over seven years ago, I had spent decades chasing love. I wanted to feel special, loved, and worthy, and that experience was only going to come from having a husband. One man after the next was my […]

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A Hopeless Citizen

I was such an enthusiastic supporter of President Obama when he first ran for office and I’m so disappointed in his second term—the time he would be able to really put his ideals into practice! I rarely speak his name any longer. During his first campaign I held meeting in my home, canvassed the neighborhood, […]

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There’s a Lump on My Breast

Around a year ago I found a lump on my breast. I’d had a clean mammogram a year earlier, but of course I needed to get it checked out asap. After another mammogram and ultrasound, it was determined to be a cyst that needed to be examined every six months. Half a year later at […]

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The Darkest Night

The past year, a dark cloud of depression rolled in and stationed itself right above me. And even though I’ve always felt that I was coming undone just a little, over the past months I felt myself coming undone in ways I wasn’t accustomed to. It feels like I spent the better part of this […]

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